10 Tips to Help Family Members of Addicts Cope and Find Support

loving an addict

Substance users may have dilated pupils or glazed eyes, slurred speech, and ramble when they talk. They can show changes in movement patterns—depending on the type of substance involved, loving an addict psychomotor retardation (heroin) or jumpiness (cocaine). Substances users often become so preoccupied with getting and using that they forego eating and suddenly lose weight.

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  • They can teach you how to deal with your partner and cope with their addiction.
  • The best way how to learn how to help an addicted loved one is trying to encourage them to receive treatment, but you can’t threaten them or coerce them into changing their behavior otherwise.
  • But with awareness, support, and dedication to personal growth, it’s possible to break free from addictive patterns and experience the joy of genuine, healthy love.
  • But sometimes, people may find themselves trying to force a positive change on their loved ones.
  • It’s hard to stay positive in an environment like this, but families can be part of the change.
  • Withdrawal can require medical treatment when a person abruptly stops heavy substance use.

To understand how to live with a loved one who has an addiction, it’s important to first learn the driving forces behind the addiction itself. Read on to learn how to overcome the challenges that can occur when living with a loved one with addiction, along with how to care for them — and yourself. Once you’ve identified how you are enabling the addict, you can start setting boundaries and outline consequences. Then, one of the only real actions you can take to help an addict is to stage an intervention and arrange for them to go to treatment.

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Learning how to deal with reality is the most important first step in “surviving” when you love an addicted person. Although it may seem easier to stay in the “fantasy space” where you can continue to believe that things are going to magically get better, there is no such magic. Different substances can have their own set of health risks and potential complications. Illegal substances, for instance, pose health dangers in addition to potential legal issues. Some substances also pose a risk for overdose, brain damage, and long-term health consequences.

Entering a support group

Complex issues around codependency and relationships are often best suited to help from a therapist or counselor. It can lock you into destructive and harmful patterns of behavior. Accepting the partner has a problem and seeking help based on this is one way of acknowledging your needs. Addictions are often called the “elephant in the room” that no one acknowledges. The hesitance to give the problem a name only adds to the confusion and ambiguity.

This can be a way for them to get some kind of help that can ultimately lead to positive changes in their alcohol/drug use. Addiction often occurs alongside other mental health conditions such as anxiety and depression. Estimates suggest that approximately half of all people with a mental disorder will also have a substance use disorder at some point during their lives. Treating feelings of love addiction may be a long journey with a lot of challenging work, but it’s possible to learn how to cultivate healthy and mature romantic love.

Life Experiences

We publish material that is researched, cited, edited and reviewed by licensed medical professionals. The information we provide is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. It should not be used in place of the advice of your physician or other qualified healthcare providers. Detachment is the process of emotionally and often physically distancing yourself from a loved one.

  • At the same time, this can make it more difficult for you to focus on your mental health.
  • During this time you will also need to create a list of things that you know you will have to change as part of your goal of letting go of an addict you love.
  • When attempting to help someone with addiction or any issue, it’s common to put the other person first.
  • Addiction often occurs alongside other mental health conditions such as anxiety and depression.
  • Family members who spend their time in these sessions may get the help they need in order to help others, and they may find the strength and resolve that’s been missing until now.
  • You might spend hours feeling your way through “if onlys” or “maybes,” yet know in your heart that you are powerless over the addiction and your loved one’s situation.

What Happens When You’re Loving Someone with Addiction

The pathway to healing and recovery is often a journey that can progress over multiple years. Addiction not only involves the individual suffering from the substance use disorder, but their partner, their family, and their friends as well. Also, don’t be afraid to directly ask your loved one how they’re doing in the recovery phase. https://ecosoberhouse.com/ Asking them about any possible urges can help them talk out their feelings rather than giving into their impulses. The first goal is to understand addiction and its potential effects on your household and relationships. We are driven to find solutions to problems and find closure for circumstances that generate emotional distress.

loving an addict

It’s not unusual to think that something you did caused them to use drugs or that you could’ve spared them from harm if only you did things differently. Guilt isn’t productive for anyone’s healing, but your involvement in their treatment and recovery can give them much-needed strength and support. Practice forgiveness and let go of the past so you can have that new beginning you have all worked toward. One of the most important factors influencing attractiveness of regular substance abuse is the existence of significant opportunities for establishing goals and experiencing meaningful rewards in life. Research demonstrates, for example, that poverty is a strong contributor to drug use, because it imposes many barriers to resources and impediments to achieving individual goals. Similarly, unemployment is a significant independent risk factor for substance use and for relapse after treatment.

loving an addict

A widely used clinical tool is the Addiction Severity Index, which provides a broad view of problems related to substance use. Problems are rated on a scale of 1 to 5 by domain, reflecting how bothered a person is by problems of that type. The ASI is typically used in gauging the type and intensity of treatment a person might need and as a measure of the success of treatment. Before thinking about how to help a loved one with drug addiction, it can be helpful to understand what it’s like loving an addict. Being in love with an addict, or having a parent or child who is an addict means that you’re often going to feel heartbroken because of their actions.

loving an addict


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